Things I Wish I’d Hear in the “Healthy Living” Sphere

It’s essential that everyone living, healthily or otherwise, doesn’t take themselves too seriously. And this post is about just that.

This is super serial, y'all.

This is super serial, y’all.

I came to this gym to flirt with muscly dudes and drink my Jamba Juice… and I’m all outta Jamba Juice.


Lemme tell you a secret about this smoothie bowl… it may LOOK like a disgusting swamp monster’s damp lair…. but it also tastes terrible.

Just get pancakes.

Just get pancakes.

There is a WRONG and a RIGHT way to do Zumba. If you can’t figure out the choreography, just leave now. Don’t waste my time.


Here’s a fun trick with lifting weights: form doesn’t matter half as much as how well your Wunder Unders fit. Just go for quick jerky motions to get it over with, try to use as much of your back as possible. What season are those crops, seriously?


When do you think they’ll start doing ‘Cold Yoga’? I’m not really into sweating.


I can’t f*cking stand protein. Real talk: I want nothing to do with it.


I think I’m just going to wear sweats to Pure Barre today. Do you think anyone will notice?



I know that endorphins are supposed to be released when you run but I think all that comes out of my brain is acetylcholine…


I kinda like yoga pants that are sheer. When I’m in down dog, they are a seamless transition from the studio to the street corner.


I’m pretty sure that the 25 minutes you spent on the elliptical didn’t ‘earn you that froyo’, Jordan. That thing cost you $10.59. What’s that, like… 2 pounds of froyo? Jesus Christ. Is that an entire slice of cheesecake in there?

Walked up the stairs instead of taking the elevator... #earnedit

Walked up the stairs instead of taking the elevator… #earnedit

Got any good ones? (This was TOO fun to write.)

The Lithe Method: A Newbie’s Perspective

Little did I know, back the long days before I officially moved to Philly, how fantastic blogging would be not only for my sanity moving to a new city, but how it could introduce me to new folks, and totally new things. The Philly Geek Awards, a mess of Philly Twitter-users, the glory of Yelp and Yelp Elite, and, most recently Lithe Method and a certain new workout Barbie friend, Julia!

There she is (sorry for the creepy photo… not really.)

Julia, having read my blog a bit when I mentioned I was heading to Philly, commented saying we should meet up sometime. Never one to blow an opportunity for a new friend, I jumped at the chance and, after a few emails and some money exchanged (between me and LivingSocial, not me and Julia), we had a friend date scheduled at none other than Philly’s own Lithe Method for my first ever Lithe 101 class.  For a little less than $40, we got 2 101 classes, 3 other classes, AND some juice!

You know I’ve never been one to turn down juice, so before I knew it, it was time to Lithe.

“What’s the Lithe Method?” you may be wondering…. Well, according to the website:

The Lithe Method® is a revolutionary, fun, multitasking and highly effective (albeit addictive) fitness regime that burns fat, sculpts muscle and puts your butt back where it used to be…in record time.

Our intense, systematic, empowering, cardiovascular workout utilizes our proprietary Cardio-Cheer-Sculpting® Technique, Lithe’s Higher Power Band System®, our signature Barre-work, and strength training with weights and other small equipment.

I’m pretty sure my butt hasn’t strayed too far from where it used to be, but the chance to Cardio-Cheer-Sculpt was intriguing, and so I donned my workout best to meet Julia.

Ok, I’m ready.

As far as what to wear, you don’t need shoes OR socks (bare feet babes!), and I’d suggest leggings or shorts (something form fitted on the bottom) with a comfortable top that allows your arms to move a lot.

The first few steps into the Lithe sanctuary, I heard pumping music, peeked a few slim ladies doing some urban rebounding on tiny trampolines, and was shocked by the amount of Lithe “stuff” they had for sale. From juices to snacks and, more prevalent, “Lithe Gear.”  Which, after a bit of checking, I realized is just dark/black tank tops and leggings with a ridiculously steep price tag.

Lithe Wear’s very own waist band… a stretchy black band for $45!

Tank tops for $105, and a pair of half-leggings, half-fishnet stockings that I’m sure will hit NYFW like a freight train in the near future.

Julia and I got to chatting, a little chit, little chat, but all the other women there were silently reading magazines and sipping on water. Not the most social bunch, but not everyone likes to make conversation pre-workout. No big.

One of the rules of Lithe is that there is no talking in class – at all. Also, no cell phones in the classroom (I like that one), no street shoes (to avoid fecal matter entering the class. Their rules actually state this.) and NO Perfume! Their 9 Rules are taken pretty seriously, it seems, so I was glad I wasn’t late!

The classroom looked like this:

At one point, my eyes were directly under that beam of sun. I felt like Simba, only blinder.

Notice those bands above the mats? Those come into play for the cheer sculpting part… We each got a mat, two 3 lb weights, and one of these great, squishy balls.

Recess? Nah, Lithe.

The first part of the class had us on our backs and, though we didn’t start right on time, we got started off hard with some ab work. Crunches, leg lifts, pilates-type stuff, occasionally utilizing the ball between our knees for bonus squeezing and work.  There was some light weight lifting (but, when you’re also working the rest of your body, those 3lbs feel real heavy, real fast).  Then, we went over to the bar.

Things at the bar definitely felt a lot like Pure Barre classes, squats, ballet-ish leg work, definitely got the heart pumping. However, it was during this portion that I realized, although there was music playing the whole time, it didn’t ever really feel like it “went” with the actions we were doing. This was a little distracting for someone who is fond of the Les Mills classes and Zumba, but I made it work.

The most unique part of Lithe 101 was the use of the resistance bands which hang from the ceiling. Holding onto these things without gloves (which they normally “require” though they seemed pretty lax with this rule for us newbies) was tough, and I felt my hands slipping a number of times as we pulled the bands down and around. This was the only part that felt like “cheer-sculpting” was going on but, as we started a little late, I think that we didn’t really get a full immersion into this portion of the class.  Oh well, maybe next time.

Throughout the class, I wore my HRM and, in the 54 minutes of the workout, burned 468 calories. A little low for this cardio queen, and I was sort of feeling a little jipped at the end.

Then, I woke up this morning and realized how wrong I was. My abs, calves, and booty are sore in the way they haven’t been in some time. I feel a general tightness that makes me wish we’d spent a little more than a few minutes at the end stretching, but that’s probably my own fault as I could’ve done it at home if I’d wanted. You’ll have to pardon me for not rushing home right away to stretch though… See, I just can’t pass up a free pristine white shower with Aveeno products….

Color me clean.

I’ll be back soon, gotta better gauge the rest of these classes. With names like “Skinny Mini”, “Barlesque”, “Waist Not”, “A-List Abs”, “Cinch”, “Arm-istice”, “Hot Legs”, “Super Fly”, and “Tight End”, there’s gotta be a lot left to learn. Maybe I’ll finally get to live out those dreams of cheering, after all.


I never had those dreams.

Ever try Lithe?

What’s your favorite class name? I’m thinking Tight End, so far.

Savoring Every Bite

So, the focus of this post will be on the first two aspects of my name: Food, and sweat. I think it would only be reasonable to keep the beers as their own post, for organization and also for the sake of bloggers/blogettes who hate beers (though I think, if you give them a chance, they could grow on you…)

Today, in each of my meals, it became abundantly clear.  I am, and will ALWAYS BE, a member of the clean plates club.

We went to Bandido’s Cafe in Durham, the one true love of my Mexican craving belly. I had pipe dreams of taking a picture of my meal before I consumed it.  Unfortunately for all you lovers of food pictures, our waitress decided that after we got chips and salsa, we were probably no longer hungry, so by the time our meals came to the table, my mind was on one thing, and one thing only.

The bottom of this plate.

Moments later, as the rest of the table oogled our coworkers new baby (who is adorable) and pushed beans and enchilada bits around their plates, I was completely finished. My plate resembled almost to a T the one pictured above (only with less food on it). I got the Racy Rodriguez, my go-to lunch combo, with a blackbean enchilada, soft chicken taco (of which I tossed the tortilla after two bites) and a side of blackbeans. Oh, and my arm’s weight in chips salsa. I savored every bite, taking little ones, in order to enjoy it all.

It was no surprise, then, when I was at the gym and had finished a rocking Ab Sculpt and Body Pump class, that my WIW (weigh-in Wednesday) was no different than last week (174). That being said, it was a great workout, and I felt killer afterwards.

The Ab Sculpt class at O2 Fitness features a different set of workouts every week that just focus on your core (abs, lower back, obliques, etc). I have to admit, I just started going to this class whenever I can, and I LOVE getting that little jolt in before Body Pump, and my abs always feel rocked.  Body Pump, once a foreign term to me, seems to be ALL OVER the health/fitness blog world, so some of you may not be familiar with it.  However, for all you newbies (especially y’all who are interested in trying it) let me say, it’s the one class that has changed the shape of my body more than any other.  Today’s class was a mix up of different releases, and went in a pretty standard order (warmup, squats, chest, back, triceps, biceps, lunges, and abs). We nixed the shoulder track because the other class had to come in, but I felt like rocked nonetheless.

I came home to roast a few veggies that I’d picked up at the Farmer’s Market (zucch, red onions, some squash I never got the name of, and eggplant).


And added them to three skewers of shrimp from Tar-jay (aka Super Target), to make this GLORIOUS concoction:

Hiding under the shrimp, you can spot MANY veggies... right?

DeLISH! I pulled the shrimp off the skewers to eat them, mixed it all up with veggies, and ate it all, one or two pieces at a time. I’m big on cutting my pieces into little bites to prolong the pleasure of the eating experience (that almost sounded sexual… I’m not mad.) The beau had a pepperoni Freschetta, which tasted looked (I may have snuck a few nibbles of pepperoni,  shhh…) Let’s just say that, other than the tails of the shrimp (you can’t eat them, right?) there is NOTHING leftover. No matter what it is, bowl or plate, I will leave it clean as a whistle.

Tomorrow is Thursday (Rebecca Black, 2011) and my VERY favorite weekday.  Early morning Body Attack express class, work post-shower, maybe a little trip to the mall, and GLASS NIGHT! (basically a happy hour that I host where we consume craft beer and appetizers and talk beer with friends and strangers.)  I bet I’ll clean my glass, too.

PERSONALLY if I don’t set aside leftovers even BEFORE I eat a meal, I will eat every last bite on the plate. It’s just in my nature… as the eldest of 5 kids in a family of 7 (and 2 dogs… and a REALLY hungry turtle) I always felt like eating meals was a sort of… competition or race. and by GOD, I was going to win.

How about you? Do you clean your plates? Or are you a big fan of leftovers?