Hey there friends!
True Story: I’ve been an Absent Agnes. Sometimes, after I take weekend trips, I immediately hop in my car and drive an hour or two for work. And then I work like a worker bee and stay in a swanky hotel (which I’ll write up soon, because it was a blast.) But then it’s back to reality, the house a little roomier (minus one beau) and the laundry a little dirtier. It’s times like these when I think that the best thing I can do for myself, and for you, my readers, is to share a (not-so-)secret secret! The secret is how I ate, for free, all last week. And that secret starts with a little thing called a Swag Bag.

Swiggity Swag.
Now, I know what you’re thinking: Jordan, if you paid for the Healthy Living Summit (which I recapped here and here), you technically paid for the Swag. Well, if you’re thinking that:
a) you’re a stickler
b) you might be right, but just roll with me on this one.
Snacks from this bag are MORE than enough to serve as breakfast every day for a week (if not more!) There’s coupons for cereal and yogurt, granola to sprinkle on top, Clif Bar, granola bar, nuts, you name it. So I’ll admit, for breakfast, I enjoyed swag e’rryday. Maybe that’s a cheat. I’m not mad.
For Monday lunch, I thanked my lucky stars I’d joined Moe’s eWorld! If you sign up, on your birthday, you get a totally free entree, just print up a coupon sent to your email. You also get a little treat just for signing up. But I don’t remember what that stuff is. Regardless, I picked up this taco salad fo’ free!

Delicioso!!
Romaine lettuce, chicken, black beans, tomatoes, salsa, onions, cucumber, jalapenos (GOODNESS I always forget how hot they are fresh!!) and a little cheese, just for good measure. No need for dressing, the salsa takes care of that, and the salad is crisp, fresh, and tasty! I made my order, I handed the fellow at the cash register a piece of paper, and VOILA. And they say there’s no such thing as a free lunch.
For dinner, I enjoyed a most-excellent Cajun grilled flounder stuffed with crab and drizzled with Pontchartrain sauce. It was served with grilled asparagus and black beans (I nixed the normal rice pilaf base).

So fancy. It's like the date you take yourself on.
How on EARTH did I get this freebie? Simple.
Rockfish Seafood Grill strikes again.
When I first signed up for their email club, I just did it to keep abreast of what was going on (since I’m there so frequently, anyway). Then I realized I got a free dessert just for receiving emails. Bread (as in croissant-bread) pudding with bourbon sauce, anyone? (yes, yes, a thousand times yes.)

Enjoyed with a Fullsteam, of course.
Full of fish, crab, and birthday joy, I slept easy.
Tuesday lunch, very appropriately, was sponsored by none other than Ruby Tuesday’s So Connected email club. Sign up, and you get a few more emails than most. But most I just delete without glancing at them. Come birthday season, though, you get a free “burger” with fries. However, the burgers include grilled chicken sandwiches, and you can get ANY of their sides instead of fries (They offer Spaghetti squash as a side!! WHO DOES THAT?!)

Also with a side of celebrity gossip!
The chicken sandwich was topped with lettuce, tomato, bacon and avocado. The bread was really thick and tasty, but I still tossed most of it away. SO FILLING!
For dinner, I decided to go off the beaten track a little and head to Chapel Hill. School had just started so, of course, I spotted about a thousand Jack Rogers sandals within moments of parking my car. Despite my rampant shoe envy of the cult of co-eds, I had my eye on one prize. A meal from the infamous “noodles” courtesy of the Noodles & Company Noodlegram!
When you sign up for this one, you can get a BOGO coupon and then, come your birthday, pop goes the freebie!

Sweet coconut curry, broccoli, carrots, red pepper, onion, mushrooms, a light portion of rice noodles, served on cabbage with black sesame seeds and shrimp!
Their Bangkok Curry is bang(kok)ing. Seriously, a nice little bit of spice (not too much), light, and the shrimp was cooked to perfection (well, fast perfection). I loved the extra crunch of the sesame seeds, and this was swell with my first pumpkin beer of the year.
For lunch… technically it wasn’t free, BUT it was discounted from my favorite pizza-mobile, Klausie’s. Coming from a food truck, I’ll take it.

Oh, Klausie's, you know my heart.
I already discussed my dinner of beers, appetizers, and THE GIANT ORGASMIC BROWNIE SUNDAY from my LivingSocial birthday crawl. What I didn’t tell you, though, is that my LivingSocial adventure was FREE because I encouraged my friends to buy through my link. Best. Deal. Ever.

And best friends, too.
For Thursday, I’d recommend getting other people to buy you meals. That always works, too.

Vegetable Pizza a la Brixx

Gyro platter thanks to the BEAU!!

Handsome fellows don't come free with meal
There were a number of other email freebies that I got emails for that I just didn’t manage to get to (birthdays are only so long, right?) BUT for an excellent list, check out Goob’s COMPREHENSIVE list at HeyItsFree!!
I hope that you, one day, can live the glamorous lifestyle of a birthday recession-ista (and moocherama).