Sweat

Workouts, exercise, fitness…

Ain’t That a Kick in the Pants?

/ foodsweatandbeers / 8 Comments

New Years are all about changes, right?

Well, my New Year’s Eve plans weren’t ALL that different from last year.  There was more beer, tastier food, 3/4 same people, but I still got to kiss my beau when the ball dropped!

MWA!

I spent the night with two of my favorite people, Ryan and Rachel, my best friend since middle school.  Coolest part of this NYE in Philly?

We didn’t even have to bring jackets!!

Those summer nights...

Which was great, because there’s no way I could’ve fit a coat into that purse.

I’ll admit, my favorite parts of the night were the dinner before and the champagne and hanging out in comfy clothes after we got home from the bar, but that’s probably because New Year’s Eve always has those ridiculous expectations and expensive cover charges that Thought Catalog summed up so nicely…

Funny thing about this new year. I don’t really have any major goals, at least nothing that I want to put into words. More just a general feeling, or general life directions.  That didn’t stop someone else from inspiring me to kick my fitness back into gear.

Text from my brother on Monday:

Connor: Hope your ride is going smoothly… question…. why did you stop using your heart rate monitor? I thought that was a cool thing.

Me: Battery died, just gotta get one and replace.

Connor: Bummer. Looking forward to its rebirth.

Knowing that my little brother had a) noticed my blog and b) recognized that something was different with my workout regime was just that kick in the pants that I needed (Check out my first Kick in the Pants which jump-started my 40lb weight loss in 2009!).  I popped over to the grocery store and, two super sales later, I nabbed a new CR2032 (the battery needed for the Garmin FR60) and was hard at work.

I only read later how difficult replacing your own watch battery and that most folks recommend taking it to a watch-person (Watch-fixer? anyone have a name for that?)

I’ll tell you what, these tools are NOT recommended for replacing your FR60 battery:

No, No, and NO!

Not my key tool, not some multi-headed screwdriver, and not the utili-tool that Ryan left here…. I felt hopeless.  Until, like a beacon in the night, I spotted it!

Glasses kit to the rescue!

This tiny tool is a precision eyeglass repair tool that I actually got the last time I bought a new pair of glasses. Well, as you can see in the image, I got it working again!! It was itty-bitty work for my giant banana fingers, but it just goes to show that being a four-eyes nerd AND a workout Barbie can pay off.

Ready for action

I guess I just needed someone to remind me why I started using that HRM in the first place.  And the only fair thing to do tomorrow  [despite having to host 3 friends during my fraternity convention weekend and picking two up from the airport (oh and working)] is to hit the gym running. Elliptical-ing. Whatever.

Have you ever experienced a kick in the pants?

Any big plans for the weekend?

You Don’t Know What You’re Missing…

/ foodsweatandbeers / 5 Comments

Good morning, folks!

It’s nice to get back to some semblance of normalcy, even if it’s temporary. This weekend, I have my fraternity’s annual conference and, in addition to picking up a few folks from the airport, I’m also playing hostess to three different fraternal friends. Should be pretty exciting considering my apartment is still in a state of post-holiday chaos and hardly big enough for two people, let alone four. But hey, it’ll be cozy.

My stomach has been getting a much-needed break from some fairly indulgent holiday treats and instead having THIS for dinner:

Bubbly meaty goodness.

Last night, I enjoyed a fantastic stir fry courtesy of chicken, chia seeds, soy sauce, and Trader Joe’s Harvest Hodge Podge veggie mix.

Most delicious Hodge Podge for moi(dge?)

It may not look as savory and mouth-watering as it tasted. I kind of just tossed the chia seeds into the mix last second and, though they didn’t add anything taste-wise to the party, they certainly boosted the Omege 3 in the meal, right? That’s gotta be good.

Mysterious thing about trips home, while I’m there, I never even realize that I’m missing the vegetables that are conspicuously absent from my diet.  Then it’s a glorious reunion.

This got me thinking of other things in my life that I don’t realize I’m “missing” in my life, until I get home (or try something new… or whatever.)

BRILLIANT!

This water-bottle friendly water fountain?! THIS IS GENIUS!!

I never really paid too much mind to the fact that my water bottle never gets truly full from standard water fountains. That tilt always gets me…  Well, this fountain has shown me the light. It’s basically ruined all other water fountains for me.

Wawa: Where Dreams Come True

I regularly think about Wawa, so this one is kind of cheating.  But honestly, I never TRULY remember how much I love their diet raspberry iced tea until I get some of it.

Note to anyone trying to get me a gift: Gallon jugs of this work just fine.

Hot enough for ya?

Why my gym doesn’t have a sauna is just beyond me. And, I’ll admit, this photo was actually taken from an old Six Pack Sunday and in a steam room, but you get the idea.  There’s nothing to compare to a great sauna session after a particularly tough workout.  My family’s gym has a fantastic dry sauna, but it’s ALWAYS packed and I figured taking a picture in a room full of sweaty men might not be received too well.

Tool of torture?

Ok, I PROMISE this is not a picture what you may be thinking it is. And, if you’re not thinking what I think you’re thinking… well, pardon me for my dirty mind. But what this IS a picture of is some sort of spiked leg roller. I’ve seen oodles of posts on the perks of foam rollers, but this is a little more of a massager. And this is how I use it.

Sweet sweet relief.

I rub my legs, my arms, my back (well, I get someone to rub that for me), and my butt. And it is heavenly. I never would’ve known that I needed this. And now that I have it, I’m never letting go of it.

Do you have any goodies that you never realized you needed until you got a hold of them?

 

Skinnylicious and Zumba-tritious!

/ foodsweatandbeers / 10 Comments

Hey hey folks, we made it to Wednesday!

Since I’m in the office for lunch, today, no No Pants Wednesday for me today…I enjoyed a few leftover chips and bread from our office holiday party for which, true to fashion, I was the only one that dressed up.

Old habits die hard.

Oh well, I think it was obvious that the holiday spirit was in everyone’s hearts as we ate our way through a MASSIVE catering by the Cheesecake Factory.

I normally steer clear of the giant Factory, known for it’s ENORMOUS portions and frying everything from zucchini to macaroni and cheese.  And I’ll admit, yesterday during lunch, I definitely over-indulged a little bit.  But by choosing a very healthy option from their “Skinnylicious Menu”, I managed to not feel too bloated after enjoying some of the shared appetizers (spinach artichoke dip and Tex Mex egg rolls).

I even had enough for a hearty dinner made of delicious leftovers.  Folks, I present about 2/3 of the Skinnylicious Grilled Salmon and Vegetables!

Skinnylicious!!

I scoped out the Skinnylicious Menu and found a bunch of (reasonably priced) healthier options and small plates that I think will definitely come in handy the next time I head to the Cheesecake Factory.  It was delicious, even reheated, and the (likely less-than healthy) dipping sauce on the side made everything even more tasty, creamy, and flavorful.

As for the Zumba-tritious…. well that’s gotta be the sore, sweaty feeling I felt after a particularly intense Zumba session at the gym!  There were actually 4 Zumba instructors in the class, though only one was the instructor, and, for some reason, I tend to get competitive when I feel like there are skilled folks in my group fitness classes.  Or if there’s a very tall lady, or a pregnant women. I don’t know, it’s a bad habit, but it’s the athlete inside of me and wants to win.

Luckily, since EVERYONE wins when we Zumba, I left feeling great.  I also left thinking about the most recent Zumba classes I’ve taken.  And I think I realized that, even though it’s supposed to be a “Latin dance inspired cardio workout”, I always prefer the songs that are less of a samba and more of a chance to dance like a crazy person.  So, in case you’re looking for a fun (short) dance party playlist, these are my three FAVORITE Zumba songs to dance to!

1. Jai Ho – The Pussycat Dolls

With a sweat-blasting pony step, sexy hip swirls, and Bollywood inspired moves, this song’s beat and tune always get me working harder/better/faster/stronger.

2. Waka Waka – Shakira

This official song of the FIFA World Cup always makes me want to kick a ball into a net, rip off my shirt, and show off my killer bod a la Brandi Chastain.

HECK YES, WE'RE THE WINNERS!

In the video, it’s very apparent that Shakira’s hips don’t lie, and the African chanting lend themselves so well to the lyrics:

You’re on the frontline
Everyone’s watching
You know it’s serious
We’re getting closer
This isnt over

If the little kids jumping all over the place in the video don’t inspire you, clearly you have no soul.

3.  Country Girl (Shake it for Me) – Luke Bryan

I think my family would disown me if they knew just how much I love country music. Clearly, my parents should’ve never let me go to school in North Carolina (oh, and falling for a Mississippi boy… I’m a walking cliche).

This song makes me wanna sweat the heck out of my achey brakey heart, eat some fried catfish, and grab some boots.

Mostly, I just look good in a cowboy hat.

What’s your favorite song to Zumba to?

Or, if you don’t Zumba, what’s your favorite song to workout to? That one tune that makes you push harder than anything else?

Black Friday: Thanks, but No Thanks

/ foodsweatandbeers / 3 Comments

Hope that y’all had a fantastic Thanksgiving! And, to those of you who were brave enough to venture to the sales last night/this morning, I salute you.

And, if you were in line last night around 9:30, I may or may not have made fun of you.  Well, not really made fun of you. More like… had my brother drive me past you as I recorded the chaos.

Super Target! Super Line!

No shame in that game, though, but I managed to get the camera I was hoping for online this morning without camping out with a Snuggie and a bag of snacks.  Whew.

While I was online, searching for my personal shopping needs, I stumbled upon a few choice items that, while unique, might not make me super happy if I found them under the tree this year.

Hoot, hoot!

For just $50, you, too, can look like a total lunatic. This “Owl Buddy” from Urban Outfitters matches perfectly with platform shoes that the model is showing off, so maybe if you’re headed out to the discotheque this year, but you wanna stay warm, you know where to go to pick up your gear!

$12 for the bear, $150 for the dentist’s office

This year, why not do yourself and your loved ones a favor and don’t buy them the 8″ tall nearly 2″ thick gummy bear from Fred Flare.

Then again, if your mother is a dentist or your family invested heavily in floss companies, by all means, get a dozen of these to hand out at the office.

Ummm.

Plush Bonsai Kitty.

Not ok.

Half a Glass? NEVER!

The Half Full Optimist’s Glass, to me, is really just half of a glass that takes up the space of a full glass. And I like full beers. I wanna drink them all. This glass hinders my ability.

Rude.

What’s the silliest gift you’ve ever received?

Word-short (Dark) Wednesday

/ foodsweatandbeers / 3 Comments

Hey folks!! Glad you enjoyed my Thanksgiving DOs and DON’Ts from yesterday, I’m so hyped for Thanksgiving but, with packing and working and traveling, I only have a bit of time to blog.  Here are some of the best things on my Pre-Thanksgiving Wednesday.

Stormy Day for Beer Lovers

Since I’m not in Pennsylvania yet, my baby brother, Connor, is doing me a HUGE favor and picking up some of Victory Brewing Company’s Dark Intrigue, a bourbon aged Russian Imperial Stout, which has been hyped up for the past month or so. It’s pouring rain there, and he’ll eventually be out there for over an hour for Dark Wednesday, the epic release of the beer!

That’s love, right there.

Ch-Ch-Ch-CHIA!

Since I’m traveling tonight on one of the (or is it THE) busiest travel days of the year, I knew I wouldn’t have time after work for fitness. So I woke up bright and early this morning and head over to crank out a quick half hour on the elliptical.  Early morning workouts, while leaving me sweaty and out of breath in the AM, are the BEST because you start the day off in such good spirits!!

Also, when you have a recovery drink of Drink Chia, it’s that much better. The folks at Drink Chia (who I actually met during the Healthy Living Summit Cocktail Party ) were kind enough to send me some of their new Mango Tangerine Drink Chia (along with their classic other flavors) and, I must admit, the new flavor is definitely my favorite. With only 40 calories and 4 grams of sugar, it’s like a dessert smoothie with the benefits of antioxidants, omega-3, and all that good stuff.

First class, baby!

Just in time for Thanksgiving weekend, I received my A-List card from Southwest in the mail today!

No lengthy lines for this girl (MUCH more important in Philly than in Raleigh Durham airport).

I feel like a baller.

Are you traveling for Thanksgiving?

What would you wait in a rainy line for?

Luchadoras Attack Durham

/ foodsweatandbeers / 3 Comments

I know, the title of this post is a bit misleading. I mentioned it in this week’s Six Pack Sunday so, if you read it, you already probably know that there weren’t actually droves of female masked wrestlers attacking innocent strangers on the mean streets of the Dirty D.

There were, however, some gorgeous masked ladies who invaded the ring at Motorco, one of Durham’s most unique and excellent venues. Serving quite a number of yummy beers, craft and otherwise, this music hall hosts everything from aerial performers to local bands to viewings of cult classics like The Big Lebowski. On Saturday, starting at noon, they went in a different route: Durham’s first Luchadoras extravaganza.  For $5, with all of the proceeds going toward grassroots food justice efforts in Durham, NC, how could I say no?

Going wild!

The folks of Durham came out en masse to cheer on these masked misses, and after grabbing two beers, Ryan and I joined the horde.  The first battle paired up two ladies , and the story was that one… maybe poisoned the friend of another…. who wanted to demask the first… for honor and shame?

I’ll be honest, the Legends behind the Luchadoras are complicated, dramatic, and crazy!! There’s so much intrigue and, considering most of the names were in another language, I struggled to keep up.

Baxter, you know I don’t speak Spanish.

After watching the villainess get demasked and shouting SHAAAAAMEEEE with my fellow enthusiasts, it was  time for a little audience participation.  The announcers, who were hype and hilarious (and struggled to not laugh at the whole shebang themselves), called for 4 female volunteers to come up to the stage.  There were a couple of quiet minutes as everyone looked at one another, wondering what it was for and why they needed these ladies?  Body painting? Date auction? Virgin sacrifice?

Of course, I waltzed up to the stage. How could I say no to one of those options?

Advance apologies for bad picture quality...

After placing the four women in the ring on each corner, they announced that we’d be battling it out for a handmade luchadoras mask of our very own!  At this point, the gloves came off. Well, in my case, the glasses did, as I handed them to a friendly stranger on the side for safe keeping.

God as my witness, I was going to get that mask.

Luckily, my three opponents were itty bitty women. I’d say none was taller than 5’6″, weighing no more than 130 lbs soaking wet. Realistically, they didn’t stand a chance.

As the mask dropped on the ring, our bodies hit the floor. I knew I had a quality grasp on the mask right when I touched it, but so did at least two other women. My strategy? Box them out with my body.  This involved (but was not limited to):

  • Rolling around
  • Trying to flip my butt on them
  • Jamming my shoulder into their body
  • Creating a body cocoon around the mask, forcing the women to get too close to me, feel awkward, and let go

I’m not sure which was the straw that broke the lucha’s back, but the last woman finally dropped and I was declared the winner.

WINNAH!! (Pictured with Juicy Booty)

To the victor goes the spoils: A killer luchadoras mask and pride that spans a lifetime.

Battle Scars

Also to the victor go the wounds: scratches on the neck, 3 nail digs on the knuckles, a really sore neck and TWO earrings yanked out.

We weren’t messing around.

I also must not forget the fact that I pretty much mooned the entire crowd. Since I wasn’t planning on battling for honor, I may have mistakenly rocked a pair of super low-rise skinny jeans which did a great job of sneaking below the crack quite a few times.

At least I was wearing cute undies?

Smack that booty!

These women were totally bad@ss. They were exciting, they were dramatic, and I’d be lucky to be in their ranks.  Which is why I gave the “scout” my card, in case he needs La Glamazon to come put some princesses in their places.

At least he knows I can take a beating.

Ever been in a physical fight?

How do you feel about professional wrestling?

The Grossest Parts of a Healthy Lifestyle

/ foodsweatandbeers / 16 Comments

**HEADS UP!! This post talks about some gross stuff like bodily functions and fluids. If you’re not into that, go look at this video about Catvertising**

Hey there folks!!

I know I’ve been a bit of a jet setter lately. In fact, I just formally received my A-List Status from Southwest Airlines thanks, in part, to my glorious Chicago trip this weekend!  All that flying can really wear a girl out, though, so I took Monday off from the gym.

Yesterday, I decided to go back and MAN, I was feeling it!  It was sweaty, it was hot (I think NC got up to 77 degrees last night!) and it just felt great.  It got me to thinking a bit, though, about all that goes into this whole “Healthy Living” stuff.  And as much as I wish I could live off cocktails, oysters, and rich scallops every day, the fact of the matter is that I made a conscious decision to live better, be healthier, and that’s what I’ll do (despite the temporary setbacks).  While it’s helped me lose weight and feel awesome, it’s not all glitz and glamor, though. In fact, there are some aspects of “Healthy Living” that are just plain gross.  So I’ve decided to share with you all

The Top 5 Grossest Parts of a Healthy Lifestyle (at least for me)

1. Realization

Afternoon Snack? Why not?

I’ll admit, my former eating habits never felt exactly “healthy” but, most of the time, I just didn’t even think about it.  When you decide to make a change to eating better, though, you have to take stock of what you are eating.  And that initial “stock taking”… to begin with, that’s already pretty gross.

Splitting a large pepperoni pizza used to be the norm. Not a homemade one, either. A greasy, cheesy gooey delivery pizza which left me lazy as a loaf.  The chemicals, the preservatives, the sheer volume of calories and fat that I was putting in my mouth… No wonder I spent the first year after college basically shutting down my body.  In the winter, I hibernated. I was like a chubby bear. The realization of what you put in your body before you decided to take control…. gross, shocking and gross.

2. Fun With Fiber

Sweet Beany Goodness

When I first started Weight Watchers, there was a focus on fiber content in food. It actually went into the equation to figure out the point value of foods. And man, I was all about it. Fiber One cereal, black beans galore, the occasional Metamucil, bran, oats, why not?

Well, as I’m sure some of you are PAINFULLY aware, there’s a song about what happens:

Beans, beans, the magical fruit… the more you eat, the more you poot! (or toot)

Fiber makes you poot. And also, it makes you poop.

There’s no better way to put it. And when my old diet used to consist of carbs on carbs on cheese on carbs, pooping wasn’t exactly something I thought about all the time.

Fiber leads to pooping. And sometimes, that’s gross. Overdo it on fiber, and you may overdo it on pooping. Or at least pooting. And I’m not a doctor or anything, so I don’t have fancy words to say it better than that. Try to find the balance that’s right for you and you can avoid being that stinky (healthy!) person that no one wants to hang out with for fear you’d trample over them on the way to the bathroom.

3. Texture Trouble

Oh yes, they’re oats. (Click on link for Vegan Homemade’s post)

No offense to anyone who loves them, but overnight oats look gross. Chia pudding looks gross.  The texture in some of these healthy foods…. is gross.  Cottage cheese, riced cauliflower, I looked through my photos to see if I had a picture of these from my own files.

I didn’t.

Because they look gross.

The texture of these foods may not be incredibly appealing. That being said, their texture does nothing to detract from their tastiness (though I’m still holding out on cottage cheese). But man, the texture… it took me a while to get over it. Blech.  Oh well.

4. Asparagus Pee

Since I’ve already written about how frequently you pee when you guzzle water like it’s going out of style (as well as some ways to keep yourself busy in the bathroom!), I figured I should focus on another pee-related topic.

Asparagus pee!

I love asparagus.Asparagus is great for detoxifying, it reduces pain and inflammation, can reduce the risk of heart disease, and is just plain good for you.

I love the flavor, I love it roasted, I love it sauteed, I love it steamed, I’ve even had it fried and loved the HECK out of it.  But no matter how you prepare it, the next time you pee, it’s stinky.  It’s a fact of life.  Put asparagus in, get stinky pee out.  Basic math, really.

At the end of the day, though, the benefits of asparagus far outweigh the bummer of asparagus pee.  And really, it’s nothing a quick flush can’t fix.

5. Sweat, baby, sweat, baby!

Drenched

It wasn’t until I started working out REALLY hard that I realized it.

You sweat everywhere!

This is not ground-shaking, mind-boggling news. It’s just that I didn’t really think about it before.  I’ve been to fitness classes where I’m pretty sure my ears have sweat coming from the lobes. For me, the most drenched area (and thus, the stem of my love for capris) is the shin region. I don’t know why, but my shins just pour perspiration. No amount of antiperspirant will prevent me from “pitting out, ” so why bother?  As long as you’re not stinky (does asparagus make your sweat smell , too?) it’s just part of being a human. But group classes and killer workouts have definitely made laundry day come around much more frequently in my household.  An easy price to pay for a fitter future, but gross, nonetheless.

Since I’m not a runner, I’ve never had to deal with bladder control during a race BUT let’s just say that, if peeing your pants is cool, consider Lauren Miles Davis (that’s definitely HER story to share!)

Do you have any particularly gross aspects of your own healthy lifestyle that you’ve learned to embrace?

Halloween Recipe and a Flavor Blasted Burger

/ foodsweatandbeers / 14 Comments

It’s November, already, but it feels like January. I’m freezing cold every morning (primarily because I’m a cheapskate who hates turning on the heat when I have a Slanket as an option) and I wasn’t expecting these types of temperatures for at least another month.

Oh, weather, you tempestuous mistress.

As I mentioned yesterday, I celebrated my Halloweekend at UNC on Friday and Saturday.  But yesterday, I had some treats of my own in store.  We had a Paranormal Potluck at my office and it featured such tasty treats as: Heart-attack-a-roni, True Blood Salsa, Sleepy Hollow Haystacks, Pumpkin Cupcakes, Jack-o-Lantern Jambon Sammies, and my own addition.

Sorting Hat Pizza Puffs!

Voila!

I adapted this recipe from an old book of Halloween treats my beau’s step-mother offered up, so unfortunately, I don’t have it to give credit where credit’s due.  Mine didn’t have the crescents on top, and I made vegetarian and meat-eater versions so I went with pepperoni slices instead of salami sticks.  Either way, they were tasty niblets, along with an easy parmesan pizza dipping sauce (take parmesan cheese + pizza sauce + microwave!! )

I know this is hardly a real “recipe” but I figured I’d share the picture so that someone can benefit from it all!!

Here’s my finished product:

Fun for the Whole Funky Bunch!

Weird Cat proffers up the goods!

After work, I decided to burn off the calories I consumed off with a killer cardio session at BodyCombat.  I also managed to blast the heck out of my shoulders with all those jabs and hooks, so I decided to keep the blast party going with a truly flavor blasted burger.

Takes a lot of punches to get these bad boys!

Since Laura’s Foodie Pen Pal package to me contained awesome ingredients meant to jam as much flavor into my food as possible, I decided to combine a few and see how it turned out.

Habanero Ketchup + Pumpkin Beer added to the mix!

I took about 1/3 lb of 93% lean beef and formed a patty.  On this patty, I added only two seasonings: wood smoked salt and pepper (wish I had fresh to grind, but oh well.)

While cooking it in a cast iron skillet, flipping it rather often, I toasted a bun with some cheddar and caramelized some red onion, and topped it all off with some avocado.  On the side, Habanero Ketchup for dipping (I prefer to dip my burgers/hot dogs, not cover it in ketchup, keeps things less soggy.)

This was, without question, the best burger I’ve ever made myself.  Ever. That’s 24 years on this earth (though I probably haven’t been making burgers all 24) and this one just blows the rest out of the water.

I savored every bite knowing, with total certainty, that I’d be repeating the burger base tonight.  We’ll see if I decide to get more creative with the toppings….  Then again, it’s hard to improve on perfection.

What would your dream burger (or turkey burger or veggie burger) be topped with?

What’s your favorite seasoning or sauce to spice up your foods?

Ode to the Awkward

/ foodsweatandbeers / 15 Comments

This post is very near and dear to my heart.

On Tuesday evening, I went to my third Pure Barre class (to see what I thought about my first one, check out my Pure Barre Breakdown).  As I mentioned before, the class may not be means for the tall people, the people who aren’t flexible, or the people without rock hard abs. But it’s a workout to kick your butt. You’ll leave drenched in sweat (or dripping actively on the barre all throughout. It takes all kinds, right?)

Something that I couldn’t help but notice, though, is it’s also a workout for the fashionistas. When you head over to the Pure Barre website, you’ll be treated to images like this one:

And they look so happy, right? (source is Pure Barre site)

Not surprisingly, when I attended my first class, everyone that joined me in the class was wearing…. well, they were wearing this. And I don’t just mean the compression black leggings, the signature purebarre socks and the slim-fitting tank tops. I mean the stone-cold looks on their faces as they tucked their hips, squeezed their fannies, and extended their elbows. I felt like the first class, as well as the one I took on Tuesday, was an hour long photo shoot that we were all supposed to have dressed for.  For comfort reasons, I wore this:

What? Not appropriate for the class? You all don't want celebratory Irish kisses as you squeeze a small ball between your thighs?

I caught myself huffing, puffing, dripping, and grunting, as I do in all group fitness classes. I’ve spoken before on group fitness etiquette and, as a huge fan of group fitness classes, I wanted to write an ode, a thank you of sorts. Not to the classes themselves, but to the people who take them. The people who take them that may not be wearing the right outfit, the folks who give me high fives when I run past them, the ones who can’t kick up to their heads like a rockette and the ones who haven’t the foggiest idea what this whole “rhythm” is.

The one thing I noticed in fitness classes, namely Zumba, BodyJam, Sh’Bam or any class related to rhythm and matching your bodies to the sweet beats blasting from the sound system, is that I have no dancing skills in my body. While other people were trying out contemporary jazz classes at their local dance studios, I spent my time doing lunge suicides and practicing soccer kicks [to no avail, as I sucked and continue to suck at soccer].

I’m not saying that this makes me unique.

But it does make my “dancing” look a lot less like the moves on Dancing with the Stars and a lot more like a jerky, athletic seizure.

Dance move or volleyball block? Now you don't have to choose.

So here’s to us, ladies and gents. The ones who work it out in class despite the fact that our hips do, in fact, lie. They lie and pretend they’re Shakira’s hips and, for a few brief minutes, we can pretend they are.

Waka Waka, nice moves, lady. (click for source)

Here’s to the silent awkward majority. When we go to BodyJam or Sh’Bam and they ask us to arabesque, our poses look something like this:

Is this what you meant? No? Well, I'll just keep doing it.

We won’t be able to do a 480 spin midair while we’re perspiring and rocking out to some new Pitbull remix, but we will work just as hard as any of you who can. When instructors ask me to pony step, chances are they assume that my kicking is an attempt at squishing some spider on the gym floor. 99% of the time, it’s not.

There was the great spider invasion of the YMCA Zumbathon Against Prostate Cancer in 2004, but we’ll forget that ever happened.

As a big thank you to all my fellow awkward weirdos out there, I want to promise you something.  As many overpriced exercise classes I go to, I will always dress in part-neon colors, part inappropriate shirts. They might even have a picture of me on them.

Ok, it's hard to tell, but this is ACTUALLY a shirt I own with a picture of myself on it.

If you feel like flailing like a lunatic in a class, I won’t make fun of you. I will be right there, matching you flail for flail. Whatever.  We’re getting our fitness on, and we’re having a blast doing it.

I just wanted to say this for the sake of anyone who might be nervous to go to their first group fitness class. Every single person in that class was a newbie at one point, and if you’re not sure about it, just do it! Get out there, flail that body, shake it like a polaroid picture, and maybe one day our paths will cross.

Chances are, though, it’ll be as I high kick you in the face in the middle of BodyJam.

I apologize in advance, I still don’t know how to control these long legs of mine.

The Lighter Side of Zumba

/ foodsweatandbeers / 15 Comments

Hey there y’all!! Long time, no blog.

This weekend was jam-packed, and I even blogged a pinch about it in this week’s Six Pack Sunday: My Cousin’s Wedding. That being said, considering it was the longest time I’ve spent home in a looooong time. Monday, since I had off, I took advantage of the bonus day and staved off my flight until Tuesday morning. The cost? One exhausted Jordan.

Payoff? Phenomenal Sister Date!

See the resemblance? (I'm the taller one, ps.)

On the agenda?

Pancakes (banana chocolate chip… with sprinkles), Baking (Namely, Courtney’s Crackled Sugar Cookies), Zumba, Lunch at Moe’s, and FroYo. All before 4pm (game time for her volleyball game!)  It was daunting, especially after drinking all the beers during the weekend, but, with little Kiley by my side, I was ready for anything.

She's also a whiz with a whisk.

Up first? The cookies.

Toss those bad boys into the oven, now what?

Since they take about 12 minutes to cook, but we were already dressed for zumba, clearly we only had one option.

Girl's got ups.

Not much of a yogi-bear

Beautiful tree pose

This is the most flexible I've ever looked. Don't believe everything you see.

16 takes of each pose later, they were ready!!

Just in time for zumba!

All iced and ready for the team!

Fast forward to a trip to the YMCA. The 1pm Zumba class on a Monday is not something my schedule normally allows, so I jumped at the chance.  When we got there, we realized that wasn’t my standard Zumba class.  It was, in fact, a whole different ballgame.

The two of us probably brought the average age of the fitness room down about 26 years. While I’m used to the  college students from UNC and Duke, or the young professionals from the Research Triangle who dress in Lululemon, Nike, and Under Armour, the fashion in this class was outfitted in jeans (no joke), plaid shorts, and stirrup pants. We stuck out like two sore thumbs. Two sore thumbs that were about 6″ taller than most of the other women in the class. We’re tall, we’re gangly, and we have zero rhythm.

Clearly, we were meant to be in this class.

Well, we were given weird looks as we were flailing around, taking steps way longer than needed, and jumping up and down.  In fact, at one point, a woman leaned over to us and said “Man, whatever you’ve got going on in your shoes, I think I need it!”

Sweet moves, Ki!

Both of us are tall, lanky, and athletic. Surprisingly, that doesn’t actually translate to being a good dancer whatsoever. It mostly translated to us looking like we were illustrating plyometric drills instead of salsa and merengue steps.  But we got some laughs, we felt like spastic jellyfish, and we broke one heck of a sweat.

Glossy

And, even though I may not have any sexy Latin moves, I can, at times, drop it like it’s hot.

Drop it low

It was great to take a group fitness class and feel like a goof, instead of focusing solely on knocking out serious cardio. I even followed my own group fitness etiquette and made sure that, since I wasn’t sure of the moves this woman used, I hung out in the back.

Do you ever take classes just “for fun”?

I can’t say I regularly do, but it’s such a welcome to take a class with a friend (or, in this case, a friend sister HYBRID!) and be silly. I still felt like it was a killer workout, but that might’ve been all the laughter (good for the abs, I heard.)

Stay tuned for a wedding post in the near future!!